Bhatupe So As I promised last time that I am going to tell you about a ladt that moved my heart so tada:
1. What is your name in full?
My name is Bhatupe Mhango. Bhatupe is a Nkhonde name and originally spelt as ``watupe``
2. When and where you born and raised up as a child
I was born in Lilongwe at Kamuzu Central hospital around 5 a.m. on 5th April, 1980. I was raised up in Lilongwe, in Area 3 until the age of 6. Between ages 6 and 17 I was raised up in other countries in southern Africa where my mother worked in the Malawian diplomatic service.
3. Where did you do your primary, secondary, tertiary education?
I started my primary school (till standard 29 at Chimutu FP School in Area 18, Lilongwe. Thereafter I attended the International (British) School of Maputo, Mozambique till 5th Grade and then completed my grades 5 to 7 at the American Embassy School of Maputo.
I did my secondary school in three different schools-first starting out at Lake Road Trust High School, a private Zambian Secondary school and then moving on to the American Embassy School of Lusaka (AESL) where I went up to 10th grade (or form 3). I completed my secondary school at the Lilongwe Private School in Malawi and attained the International General School Certificate of Education. Following this, I was one of only 3 Malawians in this class at Lilongwe Private that moved to University Education in Malawi (Most were of Asian descent and were able to move on to other International colleges or to begin family businesses).
4. What are you currently doing in the Geneva, Switzerland?
I currently work with UNAIDS, the Joint program on HIV and AIDS, as the UN Plus Global Coordinator. UN Plus is an advocacy initiative that brings together over 100 UN staff members from 37 countries and 25 different agencies and associated programs. We work towards policy change within the United Nations to enable it to best respond to the AIDS epidemic from a workplace point of view. In this regard, we are building the internal competencies of the UN to cope with the presence of HIV in the workplace. UN Plus has four main policy focal areas: (i) stigma and discrimination, (ii) confidentiality, (iii) travel and mobility issues and (iv) health insurance. Our work is supporting all of the concerned UN agencies to enforce and implement realistic and progressive workplace policies and initiatives to promote the GIPA (the Greater Involvement of People living with HIV and AIDS) principle. You may read more about our work on this site: www.unplus.org
5. Tell me in brief about your child hood and adulthood
I am one of those people that had one of the best childhoods ever! I grew up with a very educated and independent mother who allowed us freedom of thought and expression and home and enabled us to develop our artistic and academic interests. I was a tomboy (did not like girls) until the age of 13. I remember wanting to become ``a remarkable person when I grew up`` but not being sure exactly what career I wanted to pursue. That was until I met a friend of my mothers called Hawa Sinare, who was a lawyer. She worked with the PTA (preferential Trade Area). She had worked in Europe and owned a Mercedes Benz and had style. Last I heard she became a high court judge in Tanzania. So by the age of 13 I knew what I wanted to become- a lawyer- especially one for women- ``to defend the voiceless`` was my reason! I can say in my adulthood so far I have tried very much to meet the dreams of my childhood so far. I enrolled in law school but did not complete the degree program. Adulthood is an extension of one`s childhood, I think and if you enjoyed growing up as a child you can only enjoy more as an adult if you daily take steps to meet your goals.
6. When did you go for HIV testing?
I went for HIV testing in 2001 and again in 2002. I will always remember that both times it was at the same center-the Soche VCT Clinic.
7. What was your reaction after testing positive?
It was a mixture of feelings. I was partly in denial but partly determined to see myself through this ``confusing`` time. I refused the results actually and insisted that the counsellor does the test again- but she assured me that they had done the test already actually three times! After the initial shock came a calm resolve to get through it, no matter what. I do not remember feeling too bad about it- I acknowledged it as a medical condition. I knew though that the challenge would be to inform others in my world about it.
8. Who was the first person to know your sero- status?
It took me about 6 days to gain the resolve to tell someone about my positive diagnosis. And when I did it was to my partner (boyfriend) at the time.
9. What did your family, friends say?
I plucked up enough courage to tell my sister only about 3 months after my diagnosis. At the time, I had already begun treatment and had to travel to Blantyre ach month to get a re-fill of my drugs as at the time there was no provision for a positive person to get drug supplies for longer than 1 month at a time. Also, government had not yet come up with a subsidized fee for these anti-retrovirals and so I was having to pay heavily for the drugs. My mother had died and left me with a sizeable amount of money for my upkeep. This is what I tapped into quietly to pay for my medication without anyone in my family knowing. One day, overwhelmed by what this lifetime treatment plan would do to my body, I told my sister about the infection. She was very encouraging. I still remember those words she said to me: ``You silly girl, all this time you have been keeping it to yourself and suffering in silence! You should have told me earlier. How are you coping?`` I have never known compassion as I did on that day. That opened a flood gate of ``disclosures`` for me and I must say, to date, I have mostly been met only with very understanding responses. It is not correct to think that there is only negativity and stigma out there- there is hope, care and support as well! All of my family and friends have been extremely encouraging and helpful over the years and though some of them don`t know this-they give me hope to continue with the work that I do every day.
10. What drove you to go for the test?
At the time, I had two prevailing STIs going on! (sexually transmitted infections). I had a urinary tract infection (which can be transmitted sexually and or otherwise) but I also developed genital warts. The doctor that treated me for these two conditions recommended that I do a series of other tests, which I did. The tests included syphilis, gonorrhea and HIV…the first two tests all came back negative but the hiv was positively diagnosed.
11. Looking back what how do you compare life before testing positive and after testing positive?
That`s a hard question to answer! I have always been a busy person, consumed with my goals and activities and that hasn`t changed. But I think the major area in which I see a difference is I am now more focused. I want to see things through and do not just start and stop things. I am also very particular about what I spend my time on as I realise time is an investment. I am amazed that I have now lived 6 years knowingly hiv-positive and with the steady supply of anti-retroviral drugs have some many more years yet so I do not want to take this time for granted but instead to invest it in meaningful opportunities. I do not have time to sit and grieve and I do not suffer fools gladly. I also do not waste time trying to be liked by all-I realise that that may never happen so I just keep the ultimate goal in mind and the rest follows.
12. What is week day like for you?
My normal day begins with early morning devotion (am a Christian)
Next I go for a 15 to 20 minute jog around Lake Geneva-I live about 5 minutes away from the lake-right in the heart of Geneva
After my morning shower nowadays I make it a point to sit and have a proper breakfast. I have learned to do this as if I do not eat something proper I tend to snack on all sorts of junk throughout the day.
Work occupies me between the hours of 9 am and 6 pm. I enjoy my work a lot and enjoy the fact that I travel a lot and meet a lot of interesting people around the world. My evenings are spent either at different club meetings or at home in font of my computer as I am studying online. I am a member of the International Toastmasters Club of Geneva; and also go for Salsa and guitar classes. So I have to balance well between all of these interests as they all can be very engaging. Friday nights I unwind and usually do something fun with my girlfriends. There are so many great restaurants, cinemas and other places to visit in Geneva and am in a phase where am trying out new things. Saturday is a home day- I plan for the week, go grocery shopping and generally rest. Sundays I attend church before sitting back at the computer to work on my weekly assignments for my study program. Every night, the last thing I do before I sleep is take my daily dose of anti-retrovirals- I am currently on a combination of Truvada and Stockrin. They are both heavy drugs and that`s why they are recommended for night-time.
13. What challenges do you face?
I have just gotten over one challenge –that was getting used to the new drug combination, as I was on a different package altogether. Other than this there is nothing that is particular to me being a young women living with hiv. I experience the same challenges that other young women do. But the main challenge that I face every day is to not be defined by the virus in me. Living with hiv is only one aspect of my life-not all of it.
14. What makes you happy?
Giving back to my communities makes me happy-no matter where I am I want to get connected to what is central and give back of my energy, my time, my resources. These connections make me happy. Seeing people reach for their dreams also makes me happy. Over the years I have been involved at many levels as a peer educator for others-women and men-who are living with HIV. Seeing them bud as they go for the plans they have set for themselves makes me smile. It makes me feel am fulfilling my purpose.
15. What makes you sad?
Violence. Greed. Sickness. Anything that puts a burden on the normal flow of human existence.
16. What makes you go on in life?
My dreams. My hopes. My faith. I have an interesting relationship with God and I think often than not when I have run out of reasons to go on, the fact that I am his creation and that he created me for a purpose keeps me panting for more of life.
17. Do you have a boyfriend?
Yes, I do.
18. What is his sero status?
I will not answer this as I think the focus in a relationship should not be just about this-there are many other physical and other conditions that couples differ in that are never discussed. Yes, HIV is exceptional but in as far as it is up to us, we can normalise it. It is my contention that if people focused less on other people`s sero-status and instead learned to live better, healthier lives that stigma would be a thing of the past!
19. How do you guys lead your life together?
We lead a very normal relationship. He is aware of my status but that is not the central issue in our relationship, not does it occupy a huge amount of our time at the moment. We do not deny it but perhaps at this point it has not come up much. Perhaps he is still battling his own questions around the issues of HIV. Whatever the case, right now we are just enjoying each others` company and getting to know each other.
20. When do you plan to tie the knot?
The subject hasn`t come up yet! I think the relationship needs more time
21. What are your hobbies?
Playing the guitar (am at basic level)
Salsa dance
Entertaining (I love to cook for friends)
Reading and writing (get a copy of my first book, Positively Positive at African Collection Bookstore, Pacific Garden, Lilongwe). Am currently working on my first novel-watch this space!
Travel- Geneva is an hour away from many cities in Europe and whenever I can I get away
22. What do you plan to do in future?
I will not answer this. Quite happy with the present and living every day into the future.
23. Your piece of advice to Together Crew
Know your status then take measures to live a healthy and meaningful life either way. An hiv-positive diagnosis is not the end of your life-only the beginning of another. If every staff member of Together Crew went for an HIV think of how many lives this would affect? I would be happy to hear the stories if anyone is interested in sharing. Write to me at: watupe@yahoo.com
Thank you very much Bhatupe, may God bless you!
